Look at These Fucking Vegetables! They’re The Secret To Humanity’s Success

First of all, thank you to Olive Oils of Spain and iconic red bow tie and overall wearing Farmer Lee Jones for sending these really beautiful vegetables.

To celebrate this bounty, I made the best dinner ever that was so good while watching Seven Stages To Eternal Bliss. Roasted carrots with fresh herbs and leeks drizzled with olive oil and smoked salt from Newfoundland. A piece of salmon I picked up from Trader Joe’s with lime. A botanical seltzer cocktail using an iced tea blend I made with rose, chamomile, schisandra berry, and honeybush; hibiscus-ginger kombucha; and cucumber-basil seltzer. I garnished it with fresh Thai basil from my Aerogarden and some edible flowers. It was so sumptuous and the best thing I’ve eaten in ages.

I had the coziest set up for myself. I spent the day delivering a care package to this elderly woman for Dorot who survived both the Holocaust AND Soviet Bloc as her family was murdered and is still so tired from trying to keep her spirits up and needed help to send a fax.

All I could think was: "Man, can that lady catch a break?" Woof.

She said, "Nowhere to run anymore except into the sky." I said, "You’re so young! You’re going to be doing cartwheels down Madison Avenue soon!"

Ugh this fucking pandemic and the melting world.

Anyway, haven’t really put in effort into cooking for myself for awhile because I was really depressed. It was really nice to treat myself to vegetables that were sent over.

Humanity is soooo bummed out, but look at these fucking vegetables! They’re so pretty! What a gift from heaven.

Anyway, please make regenerative, sustainable farming cool again! I don’t know what’s going on in food world, but that’s the only thing I care about. I’m kinda tired of the world melting and feel like the big elephant in the room is the melting world news. That’s the secret to success: having a planet.

Don't know about you, but really feeling like we can give planet earth one more shot before we leave it for Mars. Did they even figure out distilled water or what? Do Elon Musk and Grimes eat food? What is Richard Branson planning on doing? Is everyone just going to be a raging alcoholic on Virgin Galactic while vomiting in outer space?

This girl was bitching on the phone at Trader Joe’s about how bad the fish was and all I could think was, "Yeah no shit. We’re living in a fucking pandemic during a global climate crisis."

Everyone I know is just, you know, "Really focusing on their job and what’s important." And all I can think is, "Yeah, but, if you have a job, please buy some decent produce to provide an economic incentive for good farming to exist so we exist."

I think it’s a pretty good compromise. I don’t need to soft sell it anymore. Just look at these vegetables. They’re objectively better. I want to eat these every day and if it’s cool, then you can, too, because having good produce will just be the norm.